Unleashing Your Remarkable Potential
Issue 7.35 - August 30, 2010 ISSN: 15516571

In Kevin's Own Words

Ten Ways to Make a Great First Impression

We all meet new people, in all phases of our lives. In some of those situations we may not be consciously thinking about the importance of making a good first impression; however, conscious or not, we are always making an impression.

Sometimes - be it the person we are meeting, the situation we are in or just that we are more consciously aware - we want to more than just make an impression, we want to make a great one.

The good news is there are things you can do to make great first impressions happen regularly and almost predictably. The surprising news is these suggestions may not be all the things you have thought or been taught.

Remember, since the impression is actually formed by the other person, in the end, what they ultimately think is out of your control.

Even so, using these ideas will give you a greater chance to create impressions that lead to further conversations, goodwill, new relationships, additional business, greater job and life satisfaction and greater success.

With those benefits in mind, let's get on with the suggestions!

Relax. This comes first, especially if the situation is one where you feel you need to make a great first impression. You want the new client, you want the job, you want the date - whatever the situation is, take the pressure off of yourself! Relax and just be yourself. Think about it, you can tell when people are anxious or nervous, right? Does it make you more attracted to them? Your answer is the same as everyone else's. Relax.

Smile! Few things are more attractive than a real smile - it doesn't matter if you are young or old, smiles make a difference. Whether you've spent thousands on your pearly whites doesn't matter. Let people know you are happy to meet them before a word is said. The best way to do that is with a smile. The old line that "smiles increase your face value" is an old line because it's true.

Use a good handshake. While I grew up taking this for granted, and have written about it in more detail, this one simply can't be overlooked. A good handshake says things about you that words never can. Learn to give a great handshake. Practice it. Make it your habit.

Make eye contact. In most parts of the world, this is incredibly important. Everyone has heard it, everyone "knows" it, but far too many people do it. This actually is good news for you - because when you do make eye contact consistently - you will stand out.

Be genuine and real. Be . . . yourself. Be . . . natural. After all, you want their impression to be of who you really are not some mask you have created, right? Enough said.

Be interested, not interesting. This turn of words is very powerful. Often making a great first impression is equated with impressing people. While that is true, most think about impressing people as being about showing what we know, who we know or what we've done. You will make a more powerful and lasting impression when you don't try so hard. Which brings me to . . .

Ask more, say less. You will show your interest in the other person by asking more questions and talking less. When you ask you are signaling your interest. Asking helps you learn about the other person, and who doesn't like it when people want to know more about them?

Be confident. Being confident coupled with being relaxed leads to a projected self-assurance that is both interesting and attractive. Don't try too hard, and don't take confidence as your lone tip (notice this doesn't say over-confident or cocky) - but when coupled with the other ideas on this list you will not only be more confident, but your confidence will work well.

Be present. Being present means not looking for the next hand to shake, not thinking about your own issues or deciding how to move on. It is about being with the person you are meeting, for however long you are engaged with them in conversation. Many of the other tips on this list will happen naturally when you are truly in the moment with the person.

Remember it isn't about you. Make the encounter as much about the other person as possible, and you will make great first impressions most of the time. If you are especially nervous in networking situations or if you are reading these tips before an especially important meeting, remember this tip and apply it. It is all about the other person. As paradoxical as it may seem, making a good impression will come easiest when you focus not on yourself, but on the other person.

Comments

The best leaders know they must learn many skills - including meeting, networking and building relationships with people. That's why many leaders from around the world have made the Remarkable Leadership Learning System their choice as a one skill at a time, one month at a time approach to becoming a more confident and successful leader. This system allows you to learn without travel and with your materials available whenever it works best for you. Get more than $748.25 worth of leadership development materials including two complimentary months of that unique system today as part of Kevin Eikenberry's Most Remarkable Free Leadership Gift Ever. Kevin is a bestselling author, speaker, trainer, consultant and the Chief Potential Officer of The Kevin Eikenberry Group.

Kevin's Recommends

Bury My Heart at Conference Room B:
The Unbeatable Impact of Truly Committed Managers
by Stan Slap

This is fast becoming one of the most talked about business books of the year, and for some very good reasons.

It discusses in a new way a very important topic - what are the underlying keys to management and leadership success.

It outlines different success factors than many other books do.

It comes from a pragmatic and real-life perspective.

It talks about things that often are overlooked and undersold - things like values and commitment.

It provides a framework and action steps for you to use what you are learning.

Bury My Heart at Conference Room B is a book that illuminates a process developed by Stan and his organization to help individual leaders draw out their core values and build greater commitment to organizational success. The book does a great job of using examples from their sessions and provides exercises for you to use personally - all honed from their work with 10,000 managers.

Because it deals with values and commitment, this book may challenge you. But it may also make you hopeful, joyful and see a new way to integrate who you are with what you do.

The book shows you how to do it, gives examples of many others who have done it, and proves why that is important personally and professionally.

This is not a book to buy because it is the cool next read. This is a book to read, reflect on and use.

One final note: a friend of mine clued me into an interesting thing that is going on through September 9 that includes a chance for you to win a copy of the book. Use this link to learn more about what's going on and to get your name in the hat: http://t.co/KzWc6dS.

Learn more about the book at www.BuryMyHeart.com and download a complimentary PDF resource: Tough Times, Tougher Teams while you are there!

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