Issue 1.17 of Unleash Your Potential with Kevin Eikenberry

Unleash Your Potential
Issue 1.17 - November 24th, 2004 - ISSN: 1551-6571

In Kevin's Own Words

A Gift of Gratitude

Gratitude might seem like a soft or even an obvious subject to you. Perhaps you would rather read about a leadership lesson or a marketing approach or even a motivational technique. If that is what you are thinking, I urge you to read on. I don’t think you will be disappointed.

From the time we are little kids we are taught to say thank you. It is one of the first things we learn. We are taught to say thank you because our parents know that showing that simple appreciation is polite behavior and because it is the right thing to do. This lesson is one of the most valuable we learn from our parents – one that we should definitely be thankful for.

Click HERE to hear Kevin's thoughts on
Counting your Blessings...

Warning

There are many ways that we can and should show our gratitude in a business or professional setting. I will share several of them with you, and they will be very valuable to you, if they are used with the right spirit and attitude. Approach them from an authentic attitude and you will reap more than you sow. Consider them as techniques or ploys and you risk being seen as insincere or manipulative.

Some Ideas

Given that caveat, here are some tangible ways to show your gratitude to others in a business or professional setting.

Say Thank You. Simple as that. When people do things for you or that you appreciate, say thanks. In person or on the phone, always say it when you can. A simple thank you great, but it will be even more valuable if you are specific as to why you are so thankful.
Type Thank You. Drop someone a quick email. If you can’t tell someone in person, sending a quick note of thanks is very powerful. Have you ever kept an email of thanks, reading it over again? I’ll bet you have. This shows why some written proof is so valuable. It is permanent.
Write Thank You. I have a file in the drawer beside my desk that has all sorts of notes and kind words I have received from people over the last 20 years. I seldom add something to this file without pulling something else out to relive a kind word written to me. You’ve heard it a million times – handwritten thank you notes are powerful. They are. Take the time to write people a note. Whether they work in the next cubicle, down the hall, or across the country, write out your thanks.
Share a token. Across the country in next few weeks lots of business gifts will be given. You will receive holiday fruit, coffee mugs, wine and countless other gifts. All are sent to wish you happy holidays and to thank you for your business or your relationship. These are meant to be gifts of gratitude. Think back on the holiday gifts you have received in the past from professional relationships. Which (if any) are memorable? My guess is those that felt personally selected, or that were especially relevant to your interests, or the relationship with the other person or business. Sharing gifts is a great way to show your gratitude, but will be most effective if done with thought, not but adding another name to the database to receive the flower arrangement.

I know that nothing I have said above is new or earth shattering. It is all common sense. Why do I share it then? I share it with you for several reasons, all of them equally important.

Common sense isn’t always common practice.
We all need to be reminded.
The attitude is as important as the action.

Giving and Receiving

The most wonderful part of giving the gift of gratitude isn’t that giving is the polite thing to do, though it is. It isn’t that it is the right thing to do, though it is. It isn’t even because of how good and important it makes others feel, though it does. The most wonderful part is that when we give the gift of gratitude, with the right spirit, genuinely from our heart, we get as much or more in return for giving the thanks as the receiver gets from receiving it.

The Final Paradox

If you were looking for a leadership lesson, I hope you found it. Great leaders show their gratitude freely and genuinely. If you wanted to learn something about marketing it is here – be gracious. Good marketers know that saying thank and meaning it is good business. If you wanted a motivational idea, giving thanks can be a powerful motivator to both the giver and receiver.

Be thoughtful in your thankfulness, gracious in your giving, and plentiful in your praise of others.

Make showing your heart a new habit you begin cultivating, in your organization, you’re your community, in your home today.

Thank you so much for reading.

Kevin

Vantagepoints

Thanks!

It is one of the first lessons we teach our children after they can talk. "Say thank you," we say. We drill it into their minds-identifying every situation where it applies and encouraging them to practice. In fact, I believe that when my kids were in this stage, all that practice made me better at saying "thank you" myself. We know that saying "thank you" is not only the socially appropriate thing to do, but also, it is just plain nice. Learning to say "thank you" is important lesson that we all learn early in life. (We also learn "please", but that is another essay.)

So why is it that as we grow up we often forget the initial, most important lessons?

Read was to improve on saying thank you.

Another Perspective

A "Thank You In Advance"
By Bob Burg

My friend, author and speaker Alan Proctor, says, "Many people insist on waiting for someone to do for them before they take a similar action for the benefit of the other person." Alan then teaches, "But wouldn't doing something for them first increase the chances of that goodwill being returned?"

Absolutely. In fact that's one of those immutable laws of life that successful people understand and embrace. And one of the most effective ways of working with this law is what I call the, "Thank You In Advance." It may be the best insurance policy you can buy, and it doesn't cost even one cent to purchase.

Thank people "before" they do something for you.

"I really appreciate your taking the time to..." This is great insurance that they'll make the time to do whatever you want done. I learned years ago while listening to a tape by Zig Ziglar that a tip to a waitperson used to be paid "before" the meal was even served. The word "tip", t - i - p, actually meant "to insure promptness."

Insurance, right? Or extortion, depending upon how you look at it. :-). I prefer insurance.

An example of a proper time to thank someone is "before" they start on the assignment, task or whatever. "Thank you Mary – I know you're going to do your typically excellent job." Maybe, when talking to your prospect on the telephone, "before" you launch into your reason for calling. "Mr. Smith, thank you for taking a quick moment to speak with me - I realize you're very busy." Or, the hotel manager you need to inform about a particular challenge with the hotel: "Ms. Jackson, I appreciate your helping me with this unfortunate situation."

And, the mechanic who's about to work on your car: "Mr. Davis, thank you in advance for fixing this thing. Wow, do I depend on you to keep this car working right!"

Will thanking a person in advance ever not work? Of course, because people are people and not everyone will be responsive the first time. Then you might have to use some of the other WINNING WITHOUT INTIMIDATION principles and strategies we discuss every week. The fact is, though, it works much more often than not, and over time you'll find this to be both a very pleasant and very effective way of working effectively with others.

One very important point: This must be done with sincerity. Otherwise, it'll come off as manipulative or overbearing. Just reflect for a moment about what you're most grateful for with this person, go with that feeling, and say "thank you"... in advance.

Bob Burg (www.burg.com) is author of "Endless Referrals" and "Winning
Without Intimidation" (each have sold over 100,000 copies). You may subscribe to his free weekly ezine by going to http://www.burg.com/newsletter.html.

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The Kevin Eikenberry Group
7035 Bluffridge Way
Indianapolis, IN 46278